Growing and Expanding

It's been awhile since I wrote a blog. Sometimes I think too much to sit down and type out thoughts interesting enough to have people read them. hahah. So today I'm ready!

We are in the process of opening up a store, The Tracks, an urban boutique and muralist supply, to be exact. It's culminating all the work Carlos and I have been doing to date. This is no easy task. Opening and owning a business, as well as maintaining a relationship takes great patience, maturity and communication. It's been a ride of constant tests, frustrations and beautiful creations. It has taken many life lessons, and hard work, from both of us, previous to meeting each other to get to this place. And now, we learn and grow together; as partners, lovers and revolutionary minded artists, because we believe in ourselves and each other.

By Carlos.

By Helene (me!) Shout out to my model Gaby,  you ROCK, girl!

I believe that we are all artists. We just have to find that creative process for ourselves. We begin life as artists, as young children we create all day. Then at some point it gets cut off, someone tells us to stop wasting our time, or out of pure necessity the creative process stops. Some of us are able to adapt and still have art and the creative process apart of our daily lives.

Being an entrepreneur should be second nature to artists. If one wants to make a living out of their art, whether paintings, clothing, decorating, ectera, one must adapt to the times. Artists will never be out of a job. Why? Because we have the creative skills to adapt to the changing markets. And if you match that with a positive attitude, integrity and hard work, you can never lose!  Don't get me wrong, being an artist, although a wonderful and beautiful thing, takes hard work and some serious ganas.

A re-fashioned dress from Divine Orchid (Carlos and I's woman's clothing line).

Owning a business is also a creative process. Often we have to make something out of nothing. We brainstorm creative ways to reach our target markets, and do it in a way where we can really connect with them on a personal level. Great customer service, and sales, really comes down to that, your personal connection to people. In order for it to be sincere, one must be okay with themselves. Everything that we do is not only a creative process, but a process of growth. We cannot separate the two, for when success comes, other issues will arise. Carlos and I are doing all this hard work, not only so we can do what we enjoy forever, but for our family, friends, future children, and, most importantly, for our happiness. 

Photoshoot with Shaun Ross of Lyrical Discipline for Dead Kings Collective in our print shop, New Edge.

 We have to also remember those around us that are apart of this journey. Making new friends is apart of this process. We've connected with folks from different backgrounds and we all help each other learn and grow.

Eli of Since 88 is someone who is one of those people. He has become more of a brother than a friend. Another creative and hard working dude, who is also apart of The Tracks becoming a reality. We've been doing collaborations for the last couple of years, everything from t-shirts to murals. Together, we created the Dead Kings Collective.

By Eli. Can be contacted at: elilippert@hotmail.com

Often times those folks are right in front of us. Randy has been in San Jose puttin' in the work for awhile, and is also a partner with The Tracks. Alisha, Randy's lady, is apart of this creative process and together, we're learning and growing as artists and entrepreneurs. 

By Randy

Alisha doing her thing!

 Like owning a business and being a creative individual, happiness comes with hard work. It's about having those hard (and truthful) conversations with ourselves and others. It's confronting an uncomfortable situation and saying our truths, it's being assertive, loving and compassionate. We can't do these things without self care, emotionally and physically.

We can achieve anything we put our minds to. Let's put our minds to love and see where that takes us!
Follow @Cr84empowerment

Visual Teasers. Part II

We met, we talked, we photographed. Kali is always full of wonder and surprises. She came ready with props and we were off on our journey of visual storytelling...

Till next time...smile often and feel your greatness.

Always in Creation

My man and I are in the process of opening up an urban boutique and muralist supply spot, here in San Jose. The art space is currently a "graffiti yard",  and we've been having artists from all over the Bay roll through and bless our walls. It's an amazing process. I've been photographing the space since we first moved in. It's good for the soul to see a beautiful piece of artwork up, then painted over, and another, equally beautiful piece, to replace it. It's a good practice in letting go and allowing other good things come into your life. Our new space, named "The Tracks", is a testament to that. It's us letting go (we decided I would quit my teaching job and work full-time on the business), and allowing this to come into our life. The last day of my job, we got the keys to The Tracks!

The keys!

The entrance.

We have a loft! My office will be up there. SWEET.

Quitting my job allowed me to relax on a level where I have extra energy to spare. I have more time to devote to my photo essay, and do art that I've been meaning to get to. It also means I make more connects with people and family. It's been a blessings.  It's also been very liberating and eye opening. It's the reminder that, I have the power to achieve greatness. Understanding and harnessing that energy is very powerful, it's almost overwhelming. But, it has enabled me to find the best part of me, in me, everyday.

Close up of a piece at The Tracks. By Carlos Rodriguez

I think back to times when I was not feeling so empowered, and it's great to validate me. I have to always be in the process of evolving and being aware of my space in the world. That is what much of my photo essay is about. Women taking a moment to validate themselves in the present while acknowledging the past. Our pasts, dictate who we are now (positive or negative), and it's up to use to use that knowledge, that experience, into something positive. I was reminded of this at my last Goddess meeting. It was a reminder about people's resilience to overcome any obstacles, and, more so, how many of us share these obstacles, these tests, that make us who we are today. The woman that I've spoken to, all have something in common besides their sex, they are being the woman they've always wanted to be.

A piece at The Tracks that is no longer there. By Carlos Rodriguez

I am excited for the upcoming photo shoots and opening of The Tracks. Stay tuned, cause ya'll are invited to the opening!

You got the FIRST online sneak peak. I take care of ya'll!

Till next time, smile often and breath deeply. <3

Memories, Reminders and Life

Remember a couple posts ago I told you I *may* one day share my poem with you? Well, whether you remember or not, you're in for a special treat!

Some eye candy. Art by Artist One, Color and yours truly.

I need reminders to keep me on my track of happiness and balance. We all stumble and fall, and it's up to us to pick ourselves back up and start again. The book, "The Little Engine that Could" comes to mind. When I have these moments of "ah-HA" and bring myself back to my happy place, art comes from those times. This poem came from some research I was doing for my photo documentary on Women in Hip Hop. I was reading Joan Morgan's "When Chickheads Come Home to Roost: My Life as a Hip Hop Feminist". My "ah-HA" moment came from me realizing why the word Feminism by itself was not a comfortable label for me. It came with all kind of other innuendos that I was sick and tired of hearing about. After reading Morgan's book, this is what I had to say.

Contemplating where I belong in a society where my actions, sometimes labeled as feminist, move me to scream and kick yelling, "MY FEMINISM IS MINE TO DEFINE!".

I let my cleave see the sun and my heals click on the pavement, as I embrace my feminine side without loosing the power to control my life.

Learning to be vulnerable as I process and change my lack of effective communication, why must I dwell in the affliction of the womb which I once descended?

Seeking harmony where I sometimes loose myself in relationships where I cover my insecurities with passionate love for my man, but keeping myself at a safe distance so I can act out my emotions, and not take responsibility for the loss of my emotional control. 

To be with me is a fatal blessings...my passionate love and high expectations for myself as well as you...my partner, lover, friend...

Can you be strong for me, while I'm strong for you?

I try not to hold onto my fear as a shield, but those fears manifest themselves into the confusion of life and past behaviors surface.

I must separate myself from those that crutch my love, as my crutches can only fit me.

Trying not to drown in my strength, for my weakness is fearing the side of me that needs another.

I can feel whole without someone by my side, but why should I void out companionship if I live to love?

Fueling my desire to be seen and heard without being judged by my clothes, my politics, my education...understanding that I am a woman to be reckoned with, I do deserve the love and understanding of a good man.

We can be mirrors of each other as we navigate life. 

As Jill Scott once said, "Let's take a long walk," for our movement will break barriers of what it means to be known as one, improving on the relations of our cultures, our genders, our love...

Let's build on the love that is needed to produce the family that hold sacred our ancestors struggle.

For our resistance to the status-quo will stimulate our development of our youth to breed consciousness.

No longer wanting to bear the scars of our parent's choices, we'll swim freely remembering our times as muses to those once loved, as we create history for our children to cultivate into beings that do not fear love, faith and passion, let them bask in the blessings of Yemaya, and let us see the truth in the matters of the divine.

I am living without regret, but the love of a good man is hard to forget.

I pray that some day we'll find ourselves in this world that remembers pain as a medal, but fears the scars of the soul.

Being vulnerable to the elements dose not make us worthy, for our worth in s in the wisdom we derive from our pain.

Dedicated to my lover, partner, and best friend...te quiero mucho. Till next time, love, love, love.

Our NEW art space and soon to be boutique!

Visual Teasers. Part 1 of many...

I had the first photo shoot for my photo essay. It was a magical experience. Truthfully, in the morning, I had a little anxiety. It's been more than a couple years since I last did a photo project for me. Taking photographs brings me joy, and with film it was also a surprise. Shooting with a digital camera was a whole new experience. I took photos to my hearts content, and because of that, I have more photographs to choose from for the final work of art.

BIG shout out my model, who I'm choosing to call "Sankofa" because she embodies three of the main Goddess archetypes. She's a Goddess in her own right. Here is the story of our meeting of ancestors...

Our on location shoot was brought full circle when Sankofa stated that she used to live down the street. It was a very different life for her. It probably brought back memories she wasn't trying to think about and maybe even reminded her why she lives her life the way she does. It is important for us to connect with our roots, even if it brings us pain. We must face the past to recreate the future and we must do so with ganas and the willingness to make changes. We have within us the strength to overcome obstacles and remove the barriers that stop us from being happy.

The following are sneak peaks into the story we're telling about our lives' past and present.

 

Till next time...enjoy yourself and always believe in your ability to achieve greatness!

Everyday Happiness

I'm reading a book called The Art of Everyday Ectasy, by Margot Anand. I was reminded of one of the reasons I started this photo essay in the first place...

"How did we lose our reverence for Gaia, for her wonderful sensuality and her graceful fertility? How did we lose the sense of pride in our sexuality, the knowledge  of our bodies as holy and of sexuality as the sacred foundation of life itself? How did we get the bliss of eros, of Aphrodite and Adonis, to the notion of original sin and the expulsion of Adam and Eve from the Garden? And how did we arrive at the unholy and anti-ecstatic trinity of guilt, shame and judgment that has held us in bondage for millennia? In other words, how did we murder ecstasy?"

As I'm writing this I realize that I have Gaia as my background for my computer.

You can say that my female empowerment "kick" came from my parents allowing me to dress myself from a young age (think Punky Brewester), and having two parents who always stood up for what they believed in. As I grew older,  empowerment became a way to deal with my and my friends' teenage situations. Too many of them needed a voice. As an artist, my voice was put into my photographs and poetry. I also lacked the fear for speaking up for what I believed in. I was often called on to be the voice for the voiceless. Even in middle school I had priorities for justice. I had a Save the Earth Club and often donated my money to save acres of rainforests or whales.  In high school it was safer sex and AIDS awareness and education. I am proud to say I probably stopped some teenagers from becoming parents.

I lived on my own as a senior in high school and I always had more than one job. I was dealing with my parent's separation and "growing-up". I partied hard and often. I met many people from different backgrounds, and had a variety of jobs from Jiffy Lube, an answering service and a Santa Claus booth. I did things the hard way, often. But I always pushed myself to do and be more. When I knew I needed a change, I did what it took to make it happen. That is how I found Public Allies. I served my time and got back on track. I even got into UCSC after (Go Banana Slugs!).

Public Allies Silicon Valley, graduating class of 2005

As I got older the situations for empowerment changed. I wasn't okay with being called a feminist (what my actions and beliefs were called), and found it harder to find that excitement and faith. Still making bad choices, and dismissing my emotional turmoil, I created. I did a photo documentary on Women in Hip Hop, based on the roles that women in hip hop get to choose from, and the women that break them. It was for my final at UCSC (btw, my major is no longer. VIVA Community Studies!!).  I did my research in some books and articles and sort of did an ethnography on the young woman that I taught photography to in Brooklyn. It was photography and media literacy, and they had to have a photo documentary at the end of the summer on women's issues in their neighborhoods. We had a showing of their photographs in the Empire State Building!! It was awesome!

 The ladies from the summer program, offered by Girls for Gender Equity.

Photography has always been apart of my life. I am a third generation photographer (my grandpa, dad and now me!) and I've done some pretty awesome photographs. I've even had some great photo jobs. With so much fear and doubt, I was never really able to "close the deal" to my photography career.

One day, while doing some reading for my photo documentary, I had an epiphany. I knew what I needed to say, and do. I wrote, and I wrote. I even found a label that I was comfortable with. I was no longer a feminist, I took on the label of Hip Hop Feminist (THANK YOU, Joan Morgan!). Maybe one day I'll share that poem with you. ;-)  No, I'm not going to explain what hip hop feminism is, this blog is long enough, read the book!

Photos from my photo documentary of Women in Hip Hop that was up in a gallery in Frankfort, Germany.

Fast forward to now (don't need to go too deep). My photo project is a reminder that we all stumble and fall. We have our times when we don't feel like ourselves, or have pain we don't know how to bear. It's like being lost in the woods. Some of us have the skills to stay calm and find our way, while others of us panic and freak ourselves out in thinking that we're going to die. Few of us do, but most of us find our way out, the hard and long way. The problem is, how many of us learn from our mistakes? How do we get back to our original essence of being? Being in touch with our higher selves, and with our ancestors, can give us the courage, strength and guidance we need in all parts of our life. If our masculine and feminine sides are in balance, we can reach the best part of ourselves. My photographs will show our true nature, our inner Goddesses and call on our ancestors. So join me on my journey...

Till next time, love, love, love yourself and do one thing a day that frightens you.

My alter ego, Marilyn, the penguin.

Meet the Goddess'

Every week I've been meaning to do a blog. Each week went by and I guess I didn't really have anything to say. I'm happy to say, I have words! The photo essay is building momentum and I'm excited to have some shoots coming up soon!

The fabulous woman I have met have manifested into these Goddesses.

Kali

Kali is the destroyer and creator, she is not a woman to mess with. Today's Kali is a business woman. She knows what she wants and she does what she needs to get it done. She is beautiful, strong, intelligent and family bonds are tight. She remembers and keeps sacred the sacrifices her family and ancestors have done before her, and culture is an important part of her life. Her style is unique and sexy, and her business is a reflection of all of that.

 Pachuca Cosmetics is Kali's business.

Sailor Hecate, Dead Moon Senshi. Dedicated to my friend, Sara (another amazing artist!)

Today's Hecate is still spiritual and connected to her Goddess roots. She works with computers during the day and moonlights as a Priestess. Alters decorate her home, giving homage to Goddesses in all aspects of life. Friendly animals, friends and family bless her home, and her love for art and bees keeps her happy.

 Sankofa. A symbol that means, "it is not wrong to go back for that which you have forgotten".

I choose to use this symbol to represent the first Goddess that helped inspire the photo-shoot because she stated that her connection to it is strong and it fit perfectly into the overall theme. She doesn't just embody one Goddess, she embodies Kali, Hecate and Aphrodite in one. She is the destroyer and the creator, spiritually connected and knows love and beauty beyond the physical form. She keeps her ancestors and roots close and works hard everyday to bring that light onto others. She stays true to herself and knows the time and place for fun and seriousness.

I am overwhelmed with the positive response I have received for this photo essay. I am excited to take the photographs and look forward to sharing them with you.

Till next time, love yourself a little more everyday!